Ten rules for dating
It's important to keep in mind that we live in a "me" culture, and on the whole, people are very hyper-focused on themselves. In other words, when someone acts selfishly in dating, you should focus on how this behaviour reflects on THEM as a person, rather then what it says about you. This is because deciding to stay at a cool emotional distance and "playing the field" is usually a product of getting your heart stomped on by another person.
As a result, a player will often move onto the next people they date with a kind of soulless and jaded approach.
Enjoy the salt and saturated fat-induced high while it lasts and always keep the following guidelines in mind.
When it comes to dating, many people tie their self-worth to what others think of them or how other's treat them.
Let the personality of the person you are meeting unfold. Put the physical attraction (or lack thereof) on hold while you explore the deeper things.
When you marry the right person, that person will enourage you to be the best you can be. You might be attracted to someone of the same gender.It may be the fourth date before you can really see the inner person. Beauty fades, but the inner qualities improve with age for those people who are willing to refine themselves throughout a lifetime. There is no Prince or Princess Charming and happily-ever-after without effort. Volunteer your time to help families and the lonely elderly in your neighborhood. Then ask for guidance about your problems and dating decisions. Strengthen your relationship with your Creator so that your priorities are clear when you are dating. Our sages tell us that 40 days before we are born, a heavenly voice calls out for each person, "This soul, So-and-So is destined to marry that soul, So-and-So! Even if you feel you missed your destiny - don't worry. She prayed and wept and begged that her destiny be changed. Her prayers were so effective that she married Jacob first.Many successful marriages have resulted when reluctant people were willing to give the other person a second chance. "Don't touch" is the way to come closer to developing the emotional intimacy that is neccesary for a relationship to blossom into marriage. Make a rule that you won't touch for the first 30 days. 5,761 years ago, the Jews were betrothed to G-d at Mt. Practice giving as much as you can and you will be well-prepared for marriage which is all about giving. The Jewish wisdom tradition teaches us to seek a Jewish spiritual counselor who knows Torah law and lives by it. Then you will not make a mistake in your choice of whom to marry. The Torah tells us that our Matriarch, Leah's eyes were weak. I have an e-book to help you get really clear about who you are and what you're in this world to do, so that you can communicate this clearly to your soulmate.They are likely going through some tough inner emotional turmoil and don't have the mental capacity to empathize and care for another's feelings.
So - if you are in a place where you are feeling emotionally vulnerable as well, then STAY AWAY.Especially when you take them and their behaviour at face value.