Dating someone with borderline personality disorder forums consolidating audio books


06-Jan-2020 11:00

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The person with BPD may appear to be the underdog in the relationship, while his or her partner is the steady, needless and caretaking top dog. A codependent who also yearns for love and fears abandonment can become the perfect caretaker for someone with BPD (whom they sense won’t leave).

In fact, both are codependent and it’s hard for either of them to leave. The codependent is easily seduced and carried away by romance and the person with BPD’s extreme openness and vulnerability.

Following a passionate beginning, expect a stormy relationship that includes accusations and anger, jealousy, bullying, control, and breakups due to the insecurity of the person with BPD. They fluctuate dramatically between idealizing and devaluing you and may suddenly and sporadically shift throughout the day. Their intense, labile emotions elevate you when they’re in good spirits and crush you when they’re not. If you’re on the outs with them, all their bad feelings get projected onto you.

They can be vindictive and punish you with words, silence, or other manipulations, which can be very destructive to your self-esteem.

Use of medication and DBT, CBT, schema therapy and some other modalities have proven helpful.

Most individuals with BPD have another co-occurring diagnosis, such as addiction or depression.

To do so, they try to control with commands or manipulation, including flattery and seduction.

Whereas narcissists enjoy being understood, too much understanding frightens the borderline.

They may try to bait you into anger, then falsely accuse you of rejecting them, make you doubt reality and your sanity, or even brainwash you as emotional manipulation.Generally, borderlines are codependent, and find another codependent to merge with and to help them.They seek someone to provide stability and balance their changeable emotions.Use of medication and DBT, CBT, and some other modalities have proven helpful.

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Borderlines need structure, and a combination of knowing that they’re cared about and firm boundaries communicated calmly. Studies have shown that some people recover on their own, some improve with weekly therapy, and some require hospitalization.Unlike bipolar disorder, their moods shift quickly and aren’t a departure from their normal self. Their emotions, behavior, and unstable relationships, including work history, reflect a fragile, shame-based self-image.